Perception becomes reality. This is the one most overused compliments a women can get...

Perception becomes reality. This is the one most overused compliments a women can get…


All right class…

Here’s another one for you.

“B” is for Bitches…

…who are strong and in control.

“Thanks Bitches!”

The painter’s wife’s eyes were large when she came to report what the foreman said as he was packing his truck. I was in the main office of the motel that I was running and I had hired additional staff to cover for the next couple of weeks. Women with their own stories of surviving abuse.

I had just survived my own story that same morning.

So when the painter’s wife came to report what she had just witnessed, all of the women’s faces showed anxiety and fear. They were looking at me for affirmation.

“Make sure that’s with a CAPITAL “B”!” I said loudly with my index finger in the air for emphasis.

We all laughed. They looked relieved.

The foreman needed an audience and every morning would come into my office to pay 1/2 of one night as the other guys would do the same with two per room. They would do this at 6:30 in the morning even though we opened at 8 a.m. He knew how to work the system. Every morning his behavior became more aggressive, insulting and abusive.

I tolerated this, however, I was about to leave for 10 days on vacation and I hired additional staff to cover the shifts while I was gone. This was unacceptable behavior for my staff to endure. The laws are specific. I can’t just willy nilly throw someone off the property.

My prayers were partially answered when one of his workers claimed that his foreman was going to cover his bill so he didn’t have to pay. The foreman refused. I told the foreman he needed to pack his things and leave my motel and take his roommate with him.

This is the part where it gets dicey. I was the only woman in the room. There were 4 men. The foreman came up to me, belly to belly and looked me in the eye and said

“Make me.”


I opened the door and ordered him out. He refused. I threatened to call the RCMP (rural police) and he laughed while I called them and said;

“Go ahead,they won’t do anything.”

I saw this confrontation coming the night before and had prepared for it. I had asked the painter’s wife (who also had a military background) if she could be my backup should the need arise. I explained she didn’t need to do nor say anything, just sit in a chair behind me and be my witness.

So when I picked up the phone and called her room and said “I need backup” she simply said “OK” and walked into the front office, past the men and sat down behind me.

The men were shocked. They saw me pick up the phone and heard what I said but expected a different result. Not a woman a foot shorter than they. They didn’t know what to make of this. So they turned around and left.

The foreman barricaded himself in his room.

I teach staff NON-Confrontational Conflict Management. Everyone has their own style, mine is effective and stern. There is no turning back.

I knew which company he worked for, so I contacted the head office of his company, at 8:00 a.m. on a Saturday morning and worked my way up to the director of the company.

“How did you get my number?” was his first question. Then I told him what I had just endured. I told him I wanted the bill to be paid and I wanted the foreman out of my motel. He asked who else was there. I gave him names. Then he hung up.

The bill did get paid by the worker who tried to weasel his way out of paying. ALL of the men were ordered to leave the motel, including the ones who had just worked a full night shift. Those workers were sent home. The rest were to report for maintenance duty for the next month.

I guess maintenance duty is bad. The workers were very upset and angry with the foreman. He went from a pack leader to being ostracized. That’s when he was packing his bags and loading them into the truck when the painter’s wife was passing him and he uttered the disguised insult.

As for the RCMP?

They CALLED six hours (6 hours) later to find out what happened. They never showed up! They said they were busy. I made a snide remark about donuts. They earned that one.

That’s the thing, you wish you could count on law enforcement to protect you, but honestly, you can’t. They are short staffed and in rural communities they are more like the clean up crew than protectors.

May the best person win.

Luckily, I had read Sun Tzu “The Art of War”.

“V” is for Vigilance.

Use your gifts for good, not evil.

Peace.